You can’t imagine it, the singer says. At that moment readying for her new album launch in nearly a decade, blissfully happy with her recent boyfriend, and at long last the mom to a little one after struggling to conceive for ten years, feeling invincible. Suddenly in spring she was told she had breast cancer.
The artist, real name Jessica Cornish, is renowned for speaking her mind. The album, her latest release, was meant as an transparent story, dealing with every moment of pain she’d experienced since she last recorded music (endometriosis, pregnancy loss, unsuccessful partnerships, gaslighting, suicide) with typical candour. The lead track, the song No Secrets, was launched in the spring. But by then there existed a huge secret. The illness. Then second single, her song Living My Best Life, came out in May and the artist was speaking publicly about how she was thriving, while still secretly dealing with the disease. Four weeks after she disclosed her condition, and in the start of summer she received surgical treatment.
She offers me her best “What the fuck?” look. “I put out with a song called the track No Secrets. I’m doing every media appearance, and they’re, like, ‘So what’s new with you?’ and I’m, like, ‘Erm, yeah, nothing …’” the singer has just had to call off performances because she’s awaiting follow-up surgery.
Our interview takes place at a photo studio in London. She is sporting a light brown synthetic jacket, jeans with ornate white designs, off-white boots and big frames. Think motorcycle style meets 1970s Nana Mouskouri. “I feel like I’m in the 70s and I should have a partner with a mustache.” Like the film, I say, thinking of the film. “They used to call me that!” She smiles. She is fast-thinking, bold and filter-free. She says she has always been interested in humor and is hoping to make her first comedy performance next year. “I like entertaining. When performing I basically roast the fans.”
Personal Battles and News
The artist was preparing for an appearance at the Baftas when she noticed an abnormality. “I quickly sought to get it looked at, had an scan, and they told me, ‘It appears fine; your tissue is healthy.’ And I was, like, ‘But I can feel it. My arm hurts and numbness in my fingers whenever I rise.’ And they said, ‘Well, let’s just do a biopsy?’ It happened on March 28, the post-birthday.” It was a Friday. The doctor told her if it was concerning she’d call on the Monday. By then the singer had assured herself it was fine. The way she tells it, it was inopportune to receive a diagnosis when she had so much on.
“We’re two weeks away from debuting the project after years away and an extended break. And she [the doctor] texted and said, ‘Are you free at six?’ And I assumed, ‘Oh, it’s a Zoom, it won’t be anything.’ So I jump on the Zoom thinking it’s all going to be fine, and she informs me, ‘Are you sitting down?.’ That sympathetic voice? And she continues, ‘Unfortunately but your reports have come back as aggressive cancer.’” How did you respond? “I replied, ‘That’s unfortunate. What awful timing.’ The first thing I thought was, ‘I have to survive for my boy.’”
I’ve been labeled difficult for knowing myself
She considered the operation scary and bizarre. “I dislike anesthesia. They walk you down. During crises you are wheeled, but then I just marched with a hospital gown and my rear exposed. You feel like you’re in an episode of Black Mirror.” But, she notes, she’s been blessed. No chemo, no radiotherapy, just the surgery. “Cancer sucks, man, but you know what? I’m grateful it was caught soon. I had the mastectomy recently and my right breast now resembles a odd shape.” Another grin. “At least the nipple remains.”
The follow-up procedure is therapeutic and aesthetic. Her chest, she remarks, are now “asymmetrical. The implant is larger than before. That’s impolite! I thought, don’t add insult to injury, I’m already having a hard period. Such disrespect! It’s funny because I said I’d not undergo augmentation because I’ve got perfectionism, and I know they’d never be ideal. Illness changed that.”
A History of Health Challenges
The singer is familiar with health problems. She thinks her outlook on her diagnosis has been so optimistic because she’s familiar with physical challenges. Frequently they align with peak moments, acting as a reminder, or blow, to highlight not to assume everything is fine. “Frankly, I feel fate says, ‘You having a good time? Sit down.’ From a young age, it has always gone alongside moments of success for me; something severe or obscure has affected my well-being.”
She recalls to her childhood, already beginning performing in the West End in the production (she was cast at the age of nine years old). That’s when she was diagnosed with the heart condition Wolff-Parkinson-White syndrome, which can cause a tachycardia as well as vertigo and heart flutters. “I attended rehearsals intermittently on an drip, and going back into hospital at night.” She jumps ahead six years, and young Jessica has joined the trio Soul Deep while studying at the Brit School. “I secured a deal, and I had a cerebral event. Then when I was planning to release songs in recently I had a car crash and my throat was injured and I was unable to vocalize for a year.”
Oi, I say, slow down, I am overwhelmed. At just 17? She nods|agrees
